The Day After

The day after Bank Holiday Monday, (Not yet a movie) saw zillions of parents and their littleuns take to the streets in large numbers.

Maybe local residents had heard something I hadn’t and were making their way out of the city.

The traffic was more constipated rather than congested but I stayed calm. Had our car radio worked I would have tuned into any traffic updates. But alas.

Of course nothing particularly odd had actually happened, this was simply the day after Bank Holiday, the day when the likes of Milly, Wayne, Lily, Flopsy, Tabatha, Prince, Stacey, Jordan, Chelsea and (very possibly) Jade returned to school. The roads appeared to be snarled up with people carriers, which were delivering their precious cargo’s to school. The tinted windows added to the air of mystique. Not that i’m jealous.

I got as far as a set of  traffic lights showing amber. The car in front, clearly a law abiding citizen, slowed then stopped in the middle of the junction. The lights had changed to red, and she clearly didn’t want to budge. Some gentle persuasion in the from of my bellowing horn and a bus bearing down on us both prompted her to shift. I’m not convinced she understood why she had to.

Later on, in dead slow traffic, I foolishly wanted to turn right off the main road when my health and safety was once again jeapardised by another Tuesday morning fool deciding to pullout at moderate speed in front of me. Her actions left me bewildered and the driver of yet another (?)  bus less than impressed.

Grrr… It got worse. It is my understanding that it’s a tad unsafe, indeed highly dangerous to be in the driving seat of a moving vehicle while in charge of a mobile phone, or for that matter a thermos flask, a make up mirror or lucious lashes and lipstick. Worse still, was the sight of a mum, heavily pregnant and in a hurry, pushing her firstborn across a main road oblivious to the dangers of being struck by a two tonner.

Thankfully, without witnessing, or being involved in a serious accident I got to my destination, where I hit upon a brilliant idea – driving lessons!

My own driving as you I hope appreciate, is near perfect and I consider myself something of a special case. Naturally.