What’s the best way to say goodbye to work colleagues?

There are many options, but not all are particularly clever.

1 Say nothing. Don’t even worry about tidying your workspace or desk. Just make for the exit, leaving the keys dangling from the key hole. Enjoy the moment as you run out punching the air  – as you probably won’t be invited back.

2 Say something. Tell your boss he’s a jerk and you hated every minute of working with him. This way you will be shown the door, so don’t worry about speeches or the state of your desk.

3 Say something. Better still say something appropriate and positive in your good bye note/ email / speech.

4 Do something and say something. If the employer wants to shower gifts on you, treat you to a meal with your colleagues or opens a tab in your favourite bar or club, dive in. What could possibly go wrong? That is unless you get wasted and say something offensive and let yourself down…

5 Do something and say something. Continue to do your job with integrity until the fat lady sings. Ensure your computer is clean of anything unbecoming, that anyone taking over your role has clear understanding of how you managed to do what you do including helpful notes and contacts etc.

Then, write an email that tells everyone how much you will miss them etc then make for the bar with your pals. You could then be subject to nice things being said about you and may get some sort of gift to mark the big day. If not, no worries, remember you didn’t leave in order to get plaudits. You left for other reasons. hopefully a better role somewhere else… Once you are sure the boss is settling the bill, relax. The next ones on him… and your goodbye conversations will be that more personal rather than formal.

6 Saying bye to every colleague personally with bear hugs and kisses is a great idea, but this is not always possible and there can be tears. Lots of them. Especially in an organisation of over 1000 staff. A courteous leaving email sent from your desk is another option and a tad more practical.

7 Top of my list and the one I’m quite likely to use myself in just under a weeks time  (Thank you God!) is the following message which communicates clearly the intention and with a limited use of words… It’s “I’m outta here!”

Hopefully you will settle on the best way to say your goodbyes, and remain in touch with those who made a positive difference to you… Good luck   🙂

Time for me to move on…

Just over a week ago I handed my notice in.

Phew, I said it. and it’s true. And it was so straight forward, my carefully researched and brief written notice was signed, scanned and emailed to the two bosses with the original entrusted to the Finance and HR guy. For his records of course.

I used email for the simple reason that neither guys were in the office and I wanted to get the message delivered pronto. I soon had responses which confirmed receipt of the message and wished me well.

Within three hours from beginning of my interview I had received the good news of a successful interview and the actual offer. Perfect timing, It really couldn’t have been any better than that. After 2.5 years looking too…

Mrs W was delighted. I was well chuffed too!

Handing ones notice in is an odd experience. What ever the reason for handing it in there’s a sense of power (albeit breifly) and the control is with you… For me it was a brief moment of exhilaration followed by relief, then joy. Joy is my overriding emotion now, a week later.

Looking back there was no moment of hesitation, no regrets or soul searching wondering if I have made the right decision. Neither was there an attractive counter offer from my current employer desperate to keep me at a highly inflated salary! My new employer had kept their word and sent across the contract of employment which was, duly studied, signed and returned within a matter of hours.

Game on

9 ways to upset your boss….

1
If you do your job really well, meeting targets and hitting above your weight your boss should recognise your effort, making him the happiest person alive. Conversely it may work against you…as they may actually suspect you’ll be looking for a pay increase or other reward for your effort. Best do a bad/ mediocre job.

2
Be late. At least 15 minutes late should get their hackles rising… trot out different excuses each time, or better still say nothing and hope no one notices…

If you’re due to attend a meeting, ensure you’re ill prepared or better still, late. A Starbucks coffee in your hand will indicate your priorities

3
Another sure fire way to infuriate the boss and indeed others is to be unhelpful. You can argue you’re focussed on a task before you and remind them you are not a people person. You’d much rather bully those around you into doing your dirty work for you.  Being helpful is simply not in your nature. You are aware that colleagues of yours are under pressure but that’s their problem surely. Heard that before anywhere?

4
When problems arise, find a bucket of sand and plunge your head into it. This is the most cowardly action to take instead of asking for help, run for the hills. If you are the boss – This should pee everyone off, so you’d better shape up or ship out!

5
When something you’re involved in goes really poorly, don’t let on! Everyone around you will know you were responsible but dont let that bother you.

6
Work well, get noticed for being a real dynamo and change jobs. Preferably you will go to a competitor and can take useful knowledge and customers/ clients with you. That will be a huge disappointment to the boss…

7
Argue. Bosses don’t always know how to deal with experienced staff with questions or concerns. Some bad bosses will feel uncomfortable with you and the candid nature of your dialogue and will be prone to let rip at you. A good boss will let you have your say, then put you in your place.

8
Ask how the business is faring and trading position, along with any upcoming projects which you might be called upon to contribute to. If they squirm, and splutter you know you’ve hit gold.

9
Turn up to work inappropriately dressed. Causing a major distraction in the workplace is bound to upset the boss.

There are countless ways to upset the boss, whether that was your intention or not… Be wise.

Causes of stress at work, and some ideas to help you cope…

Here are some of the more typical causes of stress in the workplace:

• Bullying or harassment
• Feeling powerless and uninvolved in determining one’s own responsibilities
• Continuous unreasonable performance demands
• Lack of effective communication and conflict resolution
• Lack of job security
• Long working hours
• Excessive time away from home and family
• Office politics and conflict among staff
• A feeling that one’s reward is not commensurate with one’s responsibility
• Working hours, responsibilities and pressures disrupting life-balance (diet, exercise, sleep and rest, play, family-time, etc)

I’m sure we can identify with some of the above if we’re feeling a tad stressed about the workplace…. For me, there are 5 shown above which are causing me ‘concern’. If you feel similarly, it might be worth considering the following to help you cope better.

Humour
Humour is one of the greatest and quickest devices for reducing stress – where I work my colleauges and I have lots of stories to help get us through the day. Often based on our daily observations of other people or the apparent chaos around us.
Humour gets the brain thinking and working in a different way – therefore it distracts even momentarily. When a bit of harmless banter starts in the office, join in, it could be a laugh!

Take a hike!
Yes, actually leave the building. Go for a short quick really brisk walk outside – This might be a 10 minute around the block or to the shops and back…but do it.
You might not feel you have the time, (we can all make excuses) but your wellbeing is worth it! So make time! Taking a break will get fresh air in your lungs and a change of scene will help de-stress you as you change your surroundings

Drink some water
Most of us don’t drink enough water – and I mean, WATER – NOT tea, coffee, fizzy or ‘sports’ drinks, fruit juice or those awful expensive caffeine drinks.
All of our organs, including the brain, are strongly dependent on water to function properly. That’s how it is!
If you starve your body of water you will function below your best – and get stressed.
Most people need 4-8 glasses of water a day, so you get a bottle or cup of the stuff now and keep it on your desk…
A by-product of this (surprise surprise) is the need to take a wee… This itself gives you a bit of a break and a bit of exercise now and then, which also reduces stress.
If you are drinking enough water, your urine will be clear or near clear – if it’s yellow/ orange you are not taking enough water.
You do not need to buy expensive bottled water. Tap water is fine.

There.
That’s a start… I’m sure there are many other things to try. Let me know how you get on….

How to really impress your boss…

“Impress that jerk? You have to be joking”

 If your boss fits the description above, he’s a bad boss (I would suggest you start looking for a change of job so you can move on).

There really are good bosses out there, honest! And you can really make a difference. These are the bosses who do their fair share and more, they lead by example, support their employees and see that hard work is rewarded.

These are the bosses we can aim to impress. Wearing provocative clothing, flirting and showering them with affection or gifts is one way – but may well lead to disaster!  Here are some more down to earth ideas…

Do your Job, and do it well
This should be your aim, regardless of job title and the salary you are on. Firstly, turn up on time, every day or shift. Attend the meetings you’re supposed to attend, meet your deadlines, and make sure you excel in the core duties of your position. In essence, do what you’re supposed to do and more if you are able. If your boss can’t count on you to do the basics, your chances of impressing him will be negligible.

Be helpful to others
If you’re up to date on your work and a colleague is obviously struggling, think about offering to help, then do it!  This will show both them and your boss that you’re at work to get the work done, and that you care. (Whether or not it falls within your job description or not).

Take the initiative
Don’t think that just mastering the basics of your job is enough. Make sure your boss knows you’re available – eager, even – to take on additional duties and special projects where and when possible. I’m NOT suggesting you become a dumping ground for extra work – But do what you can to demonstrate that you are capable of performing at a higher level.

Speak honestly
This often where the bad boss exposes him/ herself! Bad bosses are annoyed when someone voices a different opinion or indeed any opinion! Good bosses should welcome it. Don’t be shy about speaking up when something doesn’t sound right. But don’t just criticise, seek to provide alternatives and suggestions. At the end of the day, say what you need to, then let the boss(es) make their final decision.

Find viable solutions
When problems arise, show initiative and take some time to figure out a solution. Even if it’s something you need to report to the boss, offer a suggestion. If your boss chooses a different route,  don’t worry. It’s his call anyway. Showing yourself to be a problem solver is what counts.

Take some credit
When something you’re involved in goes really well, let your boss know. There’s absolutely no shame in highlighting your accomplishments  – but don’t go overboard! (Remember to give credit where it’s due to all others involved).

If you do the above, that really would be impressive!

Recruitment Agents: They’re not all bad

Recruitment Agents do get a bad press.

Like other candidates who have ever felt let down, disappointed, annoyed, ignored, lied to etc by an agent I have some measure of sympathy as we all need a level of help, honesty and professionalism. The current job market is swamped with candidates wanting a job or job change and it is the Recruitment Agents skills and judgment (selling ability) which we should be able to draw upon in our ‘season of need’.

But not all criticsm is fair.

Some aggrieved individuals have even got into naming and shaming and posting online the names of the Agencies they would advise you and I to steer well clear of… Not sure that helps much.

Of course some of the larger Recruitment companies deal with the very large clients and there is a tendency for them to number crunch in order to get their ‘candidate’ statistics up to please their bosses, who seemingly only care how many interviews are happening and how many placements their staff are succeeding in.

I suspect that smaller companies will be well aware of the pitfalls and will (and should) be offering their candidates a better and more tailored service, by actually responding to emails, phone calls and listening to your actual needs. And acting on them. In this scenario we are also more likely to get proper advice and feedback from any interview.

Over the last few years I have met and spoken to a number of different consultants/ agents, and yes, I’ve been sold the dream, lied to,  left in limbo and ignored but I’ve also benefited from some of their wisdom and advice.

None of this is recruitment business is rocket science, all it needs is a bit of common sense, courtesy and good Communication! That is one of my biggest concerns.

It’s unfair to tarnish all Consultants in the same way as there will always be bad people in every industry (and that includes both Agents and candidates,). We, the job searcher still have to play our part too and be consistent and honest in our job searching. Bad experiences should not forgotten but learned from…

There are also some very good agencies around, who will give of their time, and take great pleasure in matching good applicants to good companies. Hopefully you and I will find the service and then the role we’ve been waiting for…

Frustrating it is at times, but we mustn’t give up!

I saw the Queen

I saw the Queen but not at a garden party or at close quarters, I saw HRH from a distance through squinted eyes as she floated past us in her gold barge down the Thames the other week. Truth be told, I saw the barge not the Queen, my view was rather restricted due to the number of outstretched arms, umbrellas and the numerous waved flags in front of me. I was with our family and a couple of friends on the top of a small hillock along the Southbank, not too far from the London Eye, surrounded by thousands of other sightseers/ well wishers. A handful of Anarchist protesters were also there – for some reason.

For over three hours we waited, rooted to the spot until the flotilla came and went. Those around us were friendly and in much the same predicament. Move and be sure to lose your vantage point. Good atmosphere, but somehow restrained. After the Gold Barge for us it was back to wrestle through the crowds at Waterloo Station and onto the platform for our homeward journey.

I may not have seen the Queen, but I saw her mode of transport and can say I was there…

Interview in a hurry…

Traffic was bad and it was raining. With 20 miutes to go I was stuck in traffic wondering if I should park up and hot foot it to the meeting place.

I spied an empty parking meter and started feeding it cash after a helpful Parking Attendant told me If I could wait until after 6pm parking would be somewhat cheaper. For me this was no real help, my interview was due at 6pm and I had precisely 6 mins if I was to arrive on time.

After changing my shirt and spraying something vaguely pleasant smelling in the rough direction of my armpits, I fed coins into the pay machine and ran. Thankfully in the right direction.

With 2 minutes to spare the guy on reception had phoned my interviewer and I could relax breifly. After a short pause it was up 21 flights of stairs for my meeting. (I jest). The lift delivered me to a security door on 21 and after pressing a big plastic button entered the lobby.

It was now after 6pm and I was soon joined by my interviewer who thrust some registration forms towards me. A few moments later while the ink was still drying the meeting was underway.

She was, how shall I say, efficient and not one for small talk, she was in a hurry. At least she had my CV with her, but as the discussion ensued it was little more than a prop…

By 6.35pm (I checked)  the appointment was over and I was descended the numerous floors at high speed, this time with another traveller. Within a further 5 minutes I was starting my car engine for the trip home. I felt strangely time warped?

Oh my, that was a swift interview, my shortest yet. Let’s hope the effort was worth it!

Resigning. Some DO’s and DON’Ts

DO…
• Clean Your Computer/ Desk. Even if you give notice, your employer may decide to show you the door. Before you turn in your resignation, delete all personal files and personal notes and email messages. Make sure you have the contact information for everyone you need to keep in touch with after you’re gone.
• Give Notice. Unless the situation is untenable, giving anywhere between 2 weeks to One month in the UK standard practice when resigning. Check your terms and conditions of employment if you are unsure.
• Write a Resignation Letter. It’s a good idea to write a formal resignation letter for your employment file. You don’t need to say much more than you’re leaving and when your last day of work will be. Keep it simple.
• Offer to Help. Offer to help during the transition. The offer may not be accepted, but it should be appreciated.
• Ask for a Reference. Depending on the circumstances of your departure, ask your boss and colleagues if they would be willing to give you a reference. You can use this information in any way you choose.

DON’T…
• Be Negative. When you’re talking about your resignation with colleagues, try to emphasise the positive and (where you can) about how the experience has benefited you, even though it’s time to move on. There’s no point in being negative – you’re off, and you want to leave on good terms.
• Brag About Your New Job. Even if you just got your dream job, don’t bleat on about it. There is little point in making your soon to be ex-colleagues feel bad – because they’ll miss you
• Put too much in Writing. Regardless of how much you hate your job, your boss or the company, don’t say it. Keep that to yourself.
• Forget to Say AuRevoir. Before you leave, take the time to send colleagues a message, even a generic email. A leaving do may be organised, if this is a little formal or not your style, remember you can organise an informal get together and invite those you want to attend.

Thinking of resigning?

If you’re seriously hacked off with your job or on the look out for a change, finding your next role in the current climate might prove tricky. But, when the time comes, there will be a few things to get in order. If you are already working, the first of these will be to quit, or put politely ‘hand in your resignation’.  Here are some ideas of how that might be actioned…

1  Wait until you are in the midst of a meeting with your bosses and when the time is right, cough a few times and tell them you need water. Leave the room, and rather than heading for the kitchen, make a beeline for your desk,  do a quick clear up, before reaching for the front door and freedom!
2  Leave a written note on your bosses desk – then scarper…
3  Send an email explaining that you had reason to leave the country immediately as you’d been found out. A consequence of this will mean you wont be back.
4  Fake your death. Risky as tabloid papers will track you down. But it saves awkward questions later at any exit interview.
5  Call your bosses into the meeting room and tell them your news face to face. Agree a leaving date, then return to your desk for the remainder of the working day. Say nothing about this to anyone and work diligently till you leave. Once the wailing of your boss dies down, go make or buy some cakes. This will be viewed as a peace offering and you will maybe for the first time in your employment be seen as a hero.
They may even make you an offer to stay. (Unlikely you will accept if they are fruit cakes)
Help formulate some handover notes and do what you can to help recruit a successor. When the big day comes, treat it like any other, work best you can, say some goodbyes and leave quickly. You will have no regrets, as you have given them your best efforts and your future employer awaits…

Of course, not all the above scenarios are ideal, you would be advised to treat this process wisely. Without causing grief for any ex-colleagues or those staff you wish to remain in touch with.
• Resign gracefully, and work your notice period (if you can) and remember you are not obliged to give your reasons for leaving, even though your employer may ask.
• Tell the staff what a great bunch they are and wish them every success for the future. Leave on a positive note, especially if you are reliant on them giving a good reference.
• If you’re leaving because you feel aggrieved in some way, after being treated poorly or unfairly, keep any comments brief and to the point even if you view your boss as a muppet,