Prayer for a job

Dear God
I thank you for your love and care, and ask that you might help me in my search for a job (new job).

Frankly, I’m at the end of my tether with this job search lark and could do with a positive result soon. I know you can open doors where there are none so guess I’m after a miracle!

Please would you guide me when I write and submit job applications and when given opportunities at an interview. Help me to give a good and fair account of myself. I am not in the business of showing off, I just want to land an honest job where I might be fulfilled and be fairly paid.

Meanwhile, please give me patience to deal with the uncertainty of it all.

Amen.

A more formal prayer for a job / new job

Lord God
Thank you for everlasting love. I acknowledge, Lord, that Your love for me is deeper that the ocean and bigger than the biggest need in my heart.

All my longings and dreams I lay before you and I commit myself as well as my need for a new job into Your loving hands.

Lord God, I ask that you might fulfil the desire of my heart and bless the work of my hands so that I may find work that is fulfilling and meets the financial needs of our family. I have stood and sat before you many times before in petition and in thanks for the way you have miraculously provided for us. Once again I come, completely trusting in you and your ways at this time. I am certain that you can make a way through the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. I am confident also that you can open a way where there seems to be no way! And indeed an opportunity where there is no current opening

Lord, as I continue in my job search and as I persevere prayerfully and wholehearedly through various selection procedures and interviews, I pray that your Your mighty hand might rest upon me and grant me Your grace and mercies in the eyes of all interviewers and would-be employers. Please perfect everything that concerns me and grant me your wisdom and knowledge and put the right words into my mouth for all interviews and into written words when completing application forms..

I acknowledge that my ways are not Your ways, neither are my thoughts Your thoughts. Your ways and Your thoughts are higher than the heavens above and you alone have a perfect plan for my future and that of my family.

May your will be done.  Amen.

Things people say – (in the workplace)

Below are my translations of those things heard in or around the workplace. As such they really are open to interpretation…

When asked by a friend as to how you’re getting on in your job, you answer:
“It’s challenging”
Translation = I can’t tell you what I really think, it’s chaotic, and very demanding, like my superiors.

As part of a verbal job offer , the employer comes out with:
“I’ll look after you”
Translation (A) = Stick with us kid, this is the place to work. The opportunities and rewards are for the taking…
Translation (B) = This is not a pledge, so expect nothing from me. AKA You’re screwed.

On terms and conditions:
“We like to keep things fluid”
Translation = We make this up as we go along, and as such they are obviously subject to change. AKA What are ts and cs?

Boss on your salary:
“As you know we’re not the highest payers”
Translation = We pay what we can get away with and if you don’t like it pack your bags

The boss on hours:
“Some people work very long hours, you’re very much a 9 to 5 person”
Translation (A) = Some people work very long hours because we put them under extreme pressures, and they obviously love working here more than any family or social life
Translation (B) = Some people work very long hours because frankly they are inefficient and can’t manage their workloads.

Staff commenting on their boss:
“He’s an a**e”
Translation = He’s an a**e

Staff commenting on their boss:
“He’s an absolute nightmare”
Translation =  He’s an absolute nightmare

Boss on giving praise to staff
“Thanks”
Translation = Thanks

More on praise:
“Thanks, thanks very much, we really do appreciate your efforts”
Translation (A) = “Thanks, thanks very much, we really do appreciate your efforts”
Translation (B) = “Thanks for getting us out the s**t again”

On office vibes:
“This is a very happy place to work, in fact it’s the happiest place I’ve ever worked”
Translation (A) = This is a very happy place to work, in fact it’s the happiest place I’ve ever worked
Translation (B) = I am not of this world, I am actually deluded and have no interest in what others think or say. The fact that staff turnover is high is just coincidental

On leaving:
“We really don’t want you to leave”
Translation (A) =  We really don’t want you to leave – because you will be hard to replace as you’re really valued by us all. Is there anything I can do to help you re-consider?
Translation (B) = If you leave we will get someone cheaper, so no worries. What did you say your name was?
Translation (C) = Please don’t go. If you leave we’ll be really screwed

On superiors making decisions:
“Yes”
Translation (A) = Yes
Translation (B) = No or Yes, Doh, Search me.
Translation (C) = Up to you.

That’ll do for now…

Missing the Olympics 2012 and Team Spirit

I’m missing the first few days of the London 2012 Olympics but am so pleased we started on the trail of Gold!

Work demands meant I missed live coverage of the Olympics and I didn’t have the energy to stay up late to see sports played out – when I got home.

I did get to see most of the Opening Ceremony on BBC – and thought it a real treat, so hats off to all who were involved. This stunning production will certainly be remembered for many years to come. It was incredible. The highlights for me included the scenic transformation of rural to industrial landscapes, NHS beds that lit up, pogo-ing punks (Sex Pistols), Mike Oldfield, and the 5 molton Olympic rings. And later on, I caught up with a replay of the Queen and Daniel Craig in their helicopter stunt.

Even though I missed most of the earlier mens and ladies cycle events, the diving, some of the football to date and GB medal winners on the podium… I have seen the womens shooters in action and Team GBs trying their luck at football.

Our kids have been treated to Team GB t-shirts and due to the summer holidays are lapping up the sports on TV… They love it! The bunting from the Queens Jubilee still hangs at the front of our house and a every now and again a scream of delight goes up from our front room in response to the TV pictures when our Olympians achieve.

Work has been ridiculously busy, so much so I didn’t see my family between Tuesday morning and Friday evening. My normal 9-5 became 7.30 or 8 till midnight and on one occasion 2am. Digging individuals out of holes of their own making would appear to be a occupational hazard these days.

Thankfully 2 staff members did stay back on Thursday evening for a couple of hours to assist, which was fantastic of them. They showed some Team Spirit!

Meanwhile, back at the Olympics Team GB are reaping their rewards… as it stands we have a haul of 25 Gold Medals. Go Team GB…

9 ways to upset your boss….

1
If you do your job really well, meeting targets and hitting above your weight your boss should recognise your effort, making him the happiest person alive. Conversely it may work against you…as they may actually suspect you’ll be looking for a pay increase or other reward for your effort. Best do a bad/ mediocre job.

2
Be late. At least 15 minutes late should get their hackles rising… trot out different excuses each time, or better still say nothing and hope no one notices…

If you’re due to attend a meeting, ensure you’re ill prepared or better still, late. A Starbucks coffee in your hand will indicate your priorities

3
Another sure fire way to infuriate the boss and indeed others is to be unhelpful. You can argue you’re focussed on a task before you and remind them you are not a people person. You’d much rather bully those around you into doing your dirty work for you.  Being helpful is simply not in your nature. You are aware that colleagues of yours are under pressure but that’s their problem surely. Heard that before anywhere?

4
When problems arise, find a bucket of sand and plunge your head into it. This is the most cowardly action to take instead of asking for help, run for the hills. If you are the boss – This should pee everyone off, so you’d better shape up or ship out!

5
When something you’re involved in goes really poorly, don’t let on! Everyone around you will know you were responsible but dont let that bother you.

6
Work well, get noticed for being a real dynamo and change jobs. Preferably you will go to a competitor and can take useful knowledge and customers/ clients with you. That will be a huge disappointment to the boss…

7
Argue. Bosses don’t always know how to deal with experienced staff with questions or concerns. Some bad bosses will feel uncomfortable with you and the candid nature of your dialogue and will be prone to let rip at you. A good boss will let you have your say, then put you in your place.

8
Ask how the business is faring and trading position, along with any upcoming projects which you might be called upon to contribute to. If they squirm, and splutter you know you’ve hit gold.

9
Turn up to work inappropriately dressed. Causing a major distraction in the workplace is bound to upset the boss.

There are countless ways to upset the boss, whether that was your intention or not… Be wise.

The need for ethical Sales People

Even though I am not in sales myself I deal with a number of Sales people. If you are looking for a new job in Sales, or deciding on the sales strategy for the next Quarter… look out… and think and act ethically!

An established sales coach recently identified some of the bad habits displayed by (some) sales people. I don’t know how scientific or broad ranging this was, but he did go onto highlight some of the more serious short comings attributed to Sales people, and said that anyone doing 3 or more on the following list should be FIRED!

This should be taken seriously, because not only are they costing you and your company, sales and profit. Such individuals leave a trail of disasters and disgruntled colleagues and customers in their wake…

The 7 deadliest sins of sales people are:

1. Over-promising, and under-delivering in respect to delivery times
2. Missing rapport building opportunities,
3. Assuming you know what the potential customer wants without uncovering their key needs, wants or desires,
4. Habitually asking closed rather than open ended questions which get the customer talking,
5. Talking twice as much as listening, versus listening twice as much as you speak,
6. Talking to all the features of the product instead of spending time on the 3 main features which meet their needs!
7. Failing to make people feel special and valued

I know someone who does ALL on the above list and particularly excels at 4, 6 and 7. Somehow, amazingly he has survived thus far!

Causes of stress at work, and some ideas to help you cope…

Here are some of the more typical causes of stress in the workplace:

• Bullying or harassment
• Feeling powerless and uninvolved in determining one’s own responsibilities
• Continuous unreasonable performance demands
• Lack of effective communication and conflict resolution
• Lack of job security
• Long working hours
• Excessive time away from home and family
• Office politics and conflict among staff
• A feeling that one’s reward is not commensurate with one’s responsibility
• Working hours, responsibilities and pressures disrupting life-balance (diet, exercise, sleep and rest, play, family-time, etc)

I’m sure we can identify with some of the above if we’re feeling a tad stressed about the workplace…. For me, there are 5 shown above which are causing me ‘concern’. If you feel similarly, it might be worth considering the following to help you cope better.

Humour
Humour is one of the greatest and quickest devices for reducing stress – where I work my colleauges and I have lots of stories to help get us through the day. Often based on our daily observations of other people or the apparent chaos around us.
Humour gets the brain thinking and working in a different way – therefore it distracts even momentarily. When a bit of harmless banter starts in the office, join in, it could be a laugh!

Take a hike!
Yes, actually leave the building. Go for a short quick really brisk walk outside – This might be a 10 minute around the block or to the shops and back…but do it.
You might not feel you have the time, (we can all make excuses) but your wellbeing is worth it! So make time! Taking a break will get fresh air in your lungs and a change of scene will help de-stress you as you change your surroundings

Drink some water
Most of us don’t drink enough water – and I mean, WATER – NOT tea, coffee, fizzy or ‘sports’ drinks, fruit juice or those awful expensive caffeine drinks.
All of our organs, including the brain, are strongly dependent on water to function properly. That’s how it is!
If you starve your body of water you will function below your best – and get stressed.
Most people need 4-8 glasses of water a day, so you get a bottle or cup of the stuff now and keep it on your desk…
A by-product of this (surprise surprise) is the need to take a wee… This itself gives you a bit of a break and a bit of exercise now and then, which also reduces stress.
If you are drinking enough water, your urine will be clear or near clear – if it’s yellow/ orange you are not taking enough water.
You do not need to buy expensive bottled water. Tap water is fine.

There.
That’s a start… I’m sure there are many other things to try. Let me know how you get on….

How to really impress your boss…

“Impress that jerk? You have to be joking”

 If your boss fits the description above, he’s a bad boss (I would suggest you start looking for a change of job so you can move on).

There really are good bosses out there, honest! And you can really make a difference. These are the bosses who do their fair share and more, they lead by example, support their employees and see that hard work is rewarded.

These are the bosses we can aim to impress. Wearing provocative clothing, flirting and showering them with affection or gifts is one way – but may well lead to disaster!  Here are some more down to earth ideas…

Do your Job, and do it well
This should be your aim, regardless of job title and the salary you are on. Firstly, turn up on time, every day or shift. Attend the meetings you’re supposed to attend, meet your deadlines, and make sure you excel in the core duties of your position. In essence, do what you’re supposed to do and more if you are able. If your boss can’t count on you to do the basics, your chances of impressing him will be negligible.

Be helpful to others
If you’re up to date on your work and a colleague is obviously struggling, think about offering to help, then do it!  This will show both them and your boss that you’re at work to get the work done, and that you care. (Whether or not it falls within your job description or not).

Take the initiative
Don’t think that just mastering the basics of your job is enough. Make sure your boss knows you’re available – eager, even – to take on additional duties and special projects where and when possible. I’m NOT suggesting you become a dumping ground for extra work – But do what you can to demonstrate that you are capable of performing at a higher level.

Speak honestly
This often where the bad boss exposes him/ herself! Bad bosses are annoyed when someone voices a different opinion or indeed any opinion! Good bosses should welcome it. Don’t be shy about speaking up when something doesn’t sound right. But don’t just criticise, seek to provide alternatives and suggestions. At the end of the day, say what you need to, then let the boss(es) make their final decision.

Find viable solutions
When problems arise, show initiative and take some time to figure out a solution. Even if it’s something you need to report to the boss, offer a suggestion. If your boss chooses a different route,  don’t worry. It’s his call anyway. Showing yourself to be a problem solver is what counts.

Take some credit
When something you’re involved in goes really well, let your boss know. There’s absolutely no shame in highlighting your accomplishments  – but don’t go overboard! (Remember to give credit where it’s due to all others involved).

If you do the above, that really would be impressive!

Fulfilled or Frustrated?

‘In due season he will honour you with every blessing.’ Psalm 37:34

I understand that there is usually a gap between a dream and the achievement of that dream. The question worth considering is whether it is a fulfillment gap or a frustration gap – for you and I!

I know I suffer the frustration gap – where I recognise that I am unhappy while i’m in it. Especially at work. The consequence is that most days I’m frustrated instead of fulfilled, and the dream (as such) stifles me while I seek to move forward toward the dream.

The difference, or gap between dream and fulfillment is a dip, which  represents the adversity we face, the learning curve,  and the hard work we must be willing to invest between conception and realisation.

Sounds easy, but it’s not. Especially when the ‘dip’ you are in seems to be a road without end…

Here are some verses from the Bible which might help spur us on. ‘Don’t be impatient for the Lord (God) to act! Keep travelling steadily along his pathway and in due season he will honour you with every blessing.’ ‘Do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded…’ (Hebrews 10:35-36 NIV).

‘So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal’ (2 Corinthians 4:18 NIV).

God has promised us more than just the fulfilment of our dreams; He has promised joy in each step you take toward it.

I don’t feel particiularly joyful at present, I feel worn out, out of ‘ideas’ and lacking ‘job search stamina’.

Even so…. I won’t give up my efforts, so much at stake…

Recruitment Agents: They’re not all bad

Recruitment Agents do get a bad press.

Like other candidates who have ever felt let down, disappointed, annoyed, ignored, lied to etc by an agent I have some measure of sympathy as we all need a level of help, honesty and professionalism. The current job market is swamped with candidates wanting a job or job change and it is the Recruitment Agents skills and judgment (selling ability) which we should be able to draw upon in our ‘season of need’.

But not all criticsm is fair.

Some aggrieved individuals have even got into naming and shaming and posting online the names of the Agencies they would advise you and I to steer well clear of… Not sure that helps much.

Of course some of the larger Recruitment companies deal with the very large clients and there is a tendency for them to number crunch in order to get their ‘candidate’ statistics up to please their bosses, who seemingly only care how many interviews are happening and how many placements their staff are succeeding in.

I suspect that smaller companies will be well aware of the pitfalls and will (and should) be offering their candidates a better and more tailored service, by actually responding to emails, phone calls and listening to your actual needs. And acting on them. In this scenario we are also more likely to get proper advice and feedback from any interview.

Over the last few years I have met and spoken to a number of different consultants/ agents, and yes, I’ve been sold the dream, lied to,  left in limbo and ignored but I’ve also benefited from some of their wisdom and advice.

None of this is recruitment business is rocket science, all it needs is a bit of common sense, courtesy and good Communication! That is one of my biggest concerns.

It’s unfair to tarnish all Consultants in the same way as there will always be bad people in every industry (and that includes both Agents and candidates,). We, the job searcher still have to play our part too and be consistent and honest in our job searching. Bad experiences should not forgotten but learned from…

There are also some very good agencies around, who will give of their time, and take great pleasure in matching good applicants to good companies. Hopefully you and I will find the service and then the role we’ve been waiting for…

Frustrating it is at times, but we mustn’t give up!